Colin shrugged. "That's not my concern, I'm not a Jedi and I don't really care. As long as you find him and take him in, that's all anybody really cares about."

Spoken like all the other Saljans, I mused inwardly, but said nothing aloud.

"You should care," Qui-Gon countered with the tiniest hint of darkness in his tone, "and not merely because the fall of a Jedi is a great blow to the whole galaxy. Knowing why he fell and what his motivations are may help me better predict his moves." He sipped from his cup in peace while Colin twitched uncomfortably. "How soon do you think we can be ready to cross the border into Thara?"

"Sometime tomorrow," our host replied. "Tomorrow evening at best, but I would advise you to wait until the following morning."

"Why? So Tharin batteries can spot us easily in the daylight?" Master Qui-Gon arched an eyebrow at Colin. "If everything can be made ready by tomorrow night, then that is when we will go. I will need maps of the border region as well as the area where both Thara and Reva border on the Dospara, in case we have to use its cover to get back."

"Maps, supplies, and transportation to the border can be arranged," Colin agreed. "Are you sure you won't take anyone with you? An extra blaster can be a big help in that region."

"No," Qui-Gon quickly disagreed. "Obi-Wan and myself will go, no one else. We need the advantage of speed and stealth to get us as far into Thara as we can before attracting attention." He turned to Adi. "Has there been any response from your contacts?"

"None," she said with a slow shake of her head. "Reports are, the skirmishing is thick right along the border, all the roads are covered and any settlements within shelling distance of the border have been completely evacuated. Fortunately, the people living there have done this before, it was quick and easy to move them to safety."

Obi-Wan sighed lightly. "It's a tragedy that these people are so used to war that they have all their possessions ready to evacuate at any moment."

Qui-Gon glanced kindly at his apprentice. "Yes, and a tragedy that the Jedi were not able to stop it sooner."

Talk steered away from plans and happenings, then, and after a long time of just sitting, talking, and drinking tea, Master Qui-Gon stood up and asked that he, his Padawan, and their companion be excused. "We have some things to take care of," he explained. "We will be in our quarters if you need us."

"Of course," Adi relented, eyeing him with obvious curiosity. "I will be up later. Will you need me for anything?"

"No, this isn't a matter relating to the mission," Qui-Gon assured with a smile. "If we do not come down again before the house retires, then, good night."

Obi-Wan and I also wished everyone good night, and followed the Master upstairs to the guest room. I couldn't help but notice how cold it was in the room, and kept my two layers of sweaters on for now. "Master," Obi-Wan asked for both of us, "what is it?"

Qui-Gon eased to a seat in a chair and sat back in a relaxed pose. "The past couple of days have been a bit busy, we haven't had time for the three of us to meditate together."

"Oh yeah," I realized. We had done so once on board the ship, but since then, nothing. If the two of them meditated without me, I hadn't seen them do so, apart from Qui-Gon's solo moment the day before. "You still want to?"

"Of course," he replied as if it were only natural. "Your sensitivity to the Force is still growing, perhaps not as quickly as before, but it is growing nonetheless. We must keep exercising it and giving it a chance to strengthen. I considered that Obi-Wan and I will be away from you for a few days, so I must not waste the time we have." Rising from the chair, he knelt on the floor and arranged his robe about him so it would not be in his way. Obi-Wan and I joined him, all three of us facing each other, and I closed my eyes to let the Force do its work with me. The Master's voice sounded soothingly in my ears. "If there is to be a direction you should take, concentrate on putting yourself at peace," he advised. "This is a new place, I have sensed that you are a little uncomfortable with it and concerned about what Obi-Wan and I have to do. You must put it behind you. In the Force, there is calm."

I nodded very slighly to acknowledge his guidance and consciously cleared my mind of distractions, willingly hunting after the peace he was talking about. With the two Jedi in my immediate presence, the Force was not hard to take hold of, and time passed unmeasured while I played with it and let my more practical concerns melt away into the quiet, still essence surrounding us. I almost forgot Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were there until their gradual wakening brought me out of meditation as well. I opened my eyes and smiled as I realized I was feeling much more at ease, like I had mentally stretched and massaged my spirit. It always felt weird to me to be the first to speak after such sessions, like I was interrupting something, and so I quietly got up and took a seat in the chair offered by Qui-Gon, looking up at him with a gracious smile. "How do you feel now?" he asked as he sat across from me and began taking off his boots.

"Better, actually," I admitted. "Thanks for doing this." The Master nodded absently. I glanced at Obi-Wan as he moved around behind me to put his robe somewhere. "Do you think I'm really...growing?"

Qui-Gon sat forward with his elbows on his knees. "As I said, it feels like your sensitivity has slowed its growth. I wouldn't begin to venture any explanations as to why, but I would like you to continue to work with it, to meditate on the Force while we are gone. To make sure the growth doesn't stop completely."

I tiredly rubbed an eye. "Have you had a chance to tell Adi anything?"

"About you? No, I'm afraid not," he replied. "At some point, I'm sure she will ask me - or she will ask you." Qui-Gon's eyes narrowed a little. "Be mindful. She has a right to know, and it may make things easier if you could explain to her what it's like from your point of view. But..." His head dropped, and his eyes averted as if he were listening for something. When he spoke again, his voice was hushed secretively. "...whatever you do, do not let her find out about your feelings toward me, or Obi-Wan. She can't sense you, so you need not worry about shielding your thoughts, but there are other ways of figuring things out."

"Of course. I wouldn't dare," I assured, and then gave the Master a worried look. "But she can sense you, and Obi-Wan."

"Then we should all be grateful that Obi-Wan and I are trained in methods of control and shielding," Qui-Gon said with a half-smirk and a glance at his apprentice standing behind me. "We talked about this briefly, on the ship, while you were asleep once. We must put our feelings for you aside and concentrate on the mission. Then, there will be nothing for Master Adi to figure out."

"There is a time for everything," Obi-Wan said with a wise air, as if recalling something he had been taught. "A Jedi must know when to put things aside and when to take them up again."

"And, a Jedi must concentrate on the moment, not the past or the future, or dreams of what may or may not be," Qui-Gon concluded. "The here and now is where your mind should be." I nodded slowly at him, and he sat back with a satisfied look. "It's not an easy thing to do, I will admit that. But, until our situation becomes more clear, it would be best if no one else knew of your feelings, or anything else that might be going on between us." He gave Obi-Wan a look that bordered upon rolling his eyes in exasperation. "Things like that have a way of being blown out of proportion if not handled correctly."

I glanced at Obi-Wan, who did in fact roll his eyes, and smiled. "Are you speaking from experience?"

"Yes, but not about any particular situation," Obi-Wan answered, giving his Master a pointed look. "More like, the cumulative effects of a number of situations. You really must be more tactful with the Jedi Council, Master."

I found myself laughing, a reaction which perplexed the Padawan and brought an amused glint to Qui-Gon's eyes. "Oh, come on, Obi-Wan," I said at last, "cut Qui-Gon some slack. It's not his fault."

"You give me far too much credit," Qui-Gon cautioned.

"If tact is the only thing you're worried about, no I don't," I countered. "After all, Mace Windu withheld valuable information from you about Salji. It's no wonder you disagree with him so much."

Master Qui-Gon sighed and leaned forward again, clasping his hands in front of him and giving me a very direct, studious stare. "May I ask you, why you have such a low opinion of Master Windu? Does it stem only from what you've seen of him since arriving here, or have you carried this over from your world?"

I averted my eyes from his, though he could probably sense my discomfort regardless. "Well, I didn't like what I knew of him before I got here," I admitted, trying to be as vague as possible, "but I did honestly try to give him the benefit of the doubt. He's not making it easy."

"No, I suppose not," Qui-Gon concurred, pushing himself out of his chair. "Personality conflicts are inevitable. As you have seen, we are not always in agreement on how to proceed in any given situation." He stepped over to me, and placed a hand on my shoulder as he leaned down. "However, Mace Windu is a friend and the Senior Member of the Jedi Council, and though we seldom agree, I do not hold it against him."

I felt my face grow hot. "Yes, Master," I acknowledged weakly.

The hand moved to stroke my hair gently. "I don't mean to chastise you. But you must be mindful of your feelings - all of your feelings. I know perfectly well you are not an agent of the Dark Side," he added with that tiny half-smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, "but I would also like to keep it that way."

I chuckled at that, understanding his point at last. "I know."

"I am glad that you know the basics of the Force, its Light and Dark sides," he continued as he moved away, taking off his robe and laying it over a chair where Obi-Wan's already draped. "It saves me having to explain, and few who are not Jedi truly understand the danger of fear, anger, and hatred. You do, and that eases my mind about having you along on this mission."

I turned to look at both Jedi, who were now behind me, wondering if they were getting ready for bed. But Qui-Gon came back over to the little grouping of chairs and sat down again, having only shed robe and boots, and Obi-Wan followed, leaning against the back of my chair and hanging over my shoulder. The Master reached down and rubbed at his foot, making an irritated face, and an idea stormed into my head. Before I could restrain myself, I idly asked, "Can I massage your feet for you?"

Qui-Gon glanced up, surprised, and then a smile gradually warmed his face. "It's not necessary," he gently assured.

"I know. It doesn't have to be necessary," I shrugged, clutching on to the last threads of courage that threatened to leave me lest I back down and withdraw the offer. "It's something I want to do for you."

He remained still for a moment, his huge shoulders hunched over, shooting Obi-Wan a quick glance before looking back at me. The smile came back in force. "Very well. If you wish."

Grinning, I scooted my chair forward and gestured for him to give me his foot. Qui-Gon leaned back in his chair and gracefully angled his right leg, resting his heel on my knee. If I was impressed by the size and grace of his hands before, I nearly fell out of my chair from the size of his foot. My small fingers could barely provide enough pressure to make the massage worthwhile, but I fell to it regardless, kneading the sole of his foot with my thumbs. The Master tilted his head back on the chair and closed his eyes, sighing deeply when I worked my way along the arch and pressed hard on the tendons along the instep. Obi-Wan remained where he was, watching, and I glanced up to see that he was intently interested in what I was doing. For what reason, I did not know, but he smiled comfortingly at me and then gazed at his Master, prompting me to offer, "I can do yours next, Obi-Wan."

"Me?" he repeated, and then smiled indulgently. "I might just take you up on that offer."

"You should," Qui-Gon murmured, keeping his eyes closed. "I can think of no better way to prepare for what could be several days of travel on foot."

"You're walking to Thara?" I wondered, using my fingers to rub along the top of his foot.

"No," came the relaxed reply, "we will take a transport of some kind to the border. I will need to arrange that with Colin tomorrow. But once we cross into Thara, then we will have to go on foot so as not to attract undue attention."

"Ah," I remarked, finishing up and sliding his foot aside to take up the other one. Qui-Gon easily complied, setting his right foot on the floor and lifting up the left one. Once I started he closed his eyes again, his bearded face a mask of contentment as he half-sprawled in the chair. I had nearly finished when the door opened and Adi strode in, pausing at the sight which met her. "Hi," I greeted her.

"So this is why you have Stacey along on your mission, Qui-Gon," Adi said glibly. "A personal masseuse. Does she do your laundry as well?"

Qui-Gon didn't answer her. He didn't even open his eyes or acknowledge her presence. I protested instead. "Hey, I'm not a servant. This is just out of kindness for a tired Jedi Master." I looked up at her to see what she thought of being confronted so boldly by a stranger, but the Councilor merely raised an eyebrow much in the manner of Master Qui-Gon. "I'm not too bad at backrubs, either," I went on. "I can give you one next."

Both eyebrows went up this time, and Qui-Gon cracked open one eye in time to see this reaction. "Oh, well...thank you for offering," Adi politely responded, "but that's all right. I'm fine." Qui-Gon snorted and closed the eye again. Adi frowned at him. "As long as I'm not interrupting anything."

"Of course you're not," Qui-Gon reassured. "We finished meditating a short time ago. Has the Goeben clan gone to bed, then?"

"The children have. Colin's finishing up some work," the other Master replied. "He said he's ready to help you with anything you need, to get ready to go into Thara."

"Can he find us a transport?"

"Undoubtedly, yes."

"Good." Qui-Gon opened his eyes as I finished massaging his foot, sitting up with a smile. "Thank you very much. That was wonderful."

"Anytime," I said, beaming. "Obi-Wan?"

The Padawan tried not to catch Adi's glance as he settled into an empty chair. "Oh...you're still offering?"

"If you still want one."

"All right." He reached down to pull off his boots, wiggling his toes on the soft, woven rug before presenting one foot to be rubbed. I worked in nonchalant silence, which I could tell bugged Adi Gallia, who kept looking at me while she chatted about the mission with Qui-Gon. A ragged sigh escaped Obi-Wan, whose posture had relaxed considerably, his eyes half-closed. "You're good at this," he complimented.

"Nah, I'm just making it up as I go along," I confessed, grinning. "Feel better?"

"Much, yes, thank you," the apprentice breathed, smiling softly.

"Qui-Gon," I heard Adi say, "is this becoming...a habit?" Out of the corner of my eye I saw her gesture toward me and Obi-Wan.

"Not at all," the Master calmly answered. "First time anyone has offered, I believe. She is very good, you should let her at least rub your shoulders. Very relaxing after a hard day."

"You probably need it more than I do," Adi declined, and a big smile curved her full lips. A sense of relief trickled my way from Master Qui-Gon, which I met with a mental question that went unanswered. I finished up my treatment of Obi-Wan, and shortly after all of us were in bed.

*****

"The speeders have enough fuel in them to get you to the border and back again, with plenty of reserve," Colin instructed as he paced between a pair of well-used speeder bikes parked in the spot-lit courtyard behind his house. "My suggestion is to get close to the border, find one of those tracks Gotach told you about, and leave the speeders hidden somewhere. If you can't go back for them yourselves, we can always send someone to pick them up."

Night had fallen behind the persistent shroud of gray storm-clouds, and flakes of snow drifted down upon us. After a full day of making more visits and a lot of hurried preparation, Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were about to embark on their first reconnaissance of Thara, the enemy country to the north of Reva. I was not at all troubled about being left behind, except that I was still concerned about the two of them, as any friend could naturally expect to be. A rather large party stood in the Goeben's yard - the three Jedi, myself, Colin, his Talz friend Gotach, and the lean, narrow-eyed man who had chatted with us over dinner the other day. The Saljans were busy giving every bit of advice they had about travel, snowstorms, Tharin customs, current news of the battle, geography, and stealth; granted, Master Qui-Gon needed little of it, being the well-rounded Jedi who knew how to take care of himself in both battle and travel, but he listened patiently. Adi Gallia stood beside him, keenly attentive to Colin's lecturing, while Obi-Wan checked out the controls of the speeder bikes. The Padawan had expressed definite interest in the offered mode of transport, since snowspeeders were too large and could not maneuver in the dense forests where the Jedi would have to cross the border. I teased him about having a need for speed, but he only smirked in return and went back to inspecting the vehicles.

Gotach fidgeted nervously around so many humans. Colin had introduced him as being part of the militia's intelligence force, but he didn't seem to me to be brave or composed enough to be a member of the militia. "Have you the schematics I brought for you?" he wondered of Qui-Gon.

The Master nodded slowly. "I have already downloaded the information," he explained, bringing something out from under his robe. I perked up when I saw that it was his holoprojector, the palm-sized device that could display anything from stored information to active communications. He activated it with a tap of a button, and a glowing image appeared hovering above it, a three-dimensional topographic map with lines and dots on it marking roads, borderlines, and settlements. I only got a short glimpse of it, because he only displayed it for a moment to satisfy the Saljans that he was prepared, and then tucked the holoprojector away on his belt. "We have everything we need, including survival rations and gear should we become stranded in the mountains."

"Are you sure you won't take another along with you?" Colin pressed. "You might need someone with a blaster to back you up, and you really could use a guide..."

"My mind is made up Colin. I said no, and I will not change it," Qui-Gon firmly answered, clasping his hands beneath his robe sleeves. "This is very dangerous, I will not involve anyone in it but myself and my apprentice."

Our host sighed, but nodded relentingly. "All right. If you're sure. But don't trust anyone! You can't be certain if you encounter anyone near the border on either side, whether they're Tharin, Revin, or some spy for either."

Qui-Gon allowed himself a pale smile. "I will be mindful."

As the Master had expected, the two Jedi would not be crossing the border at a checkpoint, for most roads were still under fire or else closely watched by snipers. Gotach had brought them all the intelligence reports they could have possibly needed, and told them about "tracks," secret trails in inconspicuous locations that the militia and their spies used to get in and out of Thara on a regular basis. Qui-Gon had told no one of which track he had decided to use, and that unnerved Gotach even more, but Jedi Masters can be stubborn and the Talz quickly figured out that he would never get that information. He declined to offer any more questions or advice now that we were outside, ready to see the two Jedi off. Colin, though, ticked through a mental checklist of the supplies he had stashed onboard the speeder bikes, including tents, extra food and fuel sticks, rope, and emergency gear. "I guess, if that's all you need," he concluded with some concern, "I shouldn't bother trying to convince you that you might be underestimating the severity of the weather and the fighting."

"I have been through far worse, and come out of it far better," Qui-Gon assured, glancing at Obi-Wan as he returned to our little knot. "The Jedi are resourceful, Colin. It takes more than cold and snow to keep us from carrying out a mission."

"All right." Colin turned to Adi instead and started discussing the latest news from the front, but I watched Qui-Gon to see what he was going to do next. He stood there for a moment gazing at the speeders, loaned to their use by good-hearted people of Droste who wanted to aid any effort to seek peace. They weren't in the best of shape, but they would certainly hold up for the duration of this journey. As I thought about being separated from my constant companions for what could be days, the little thread of worry crept into my heart again, and before I could assure myself that there was nothing to worry about, the Master's head turned and his eyes found mine. He gave a little nod, a gesture beckoning me closer, and began walking slowly away from the others.

I obeyed his unspoken request and followed Qui-Gon, who seemed to be walking around the yard on a casual inspection of the vehicles and supplies. He paced slow enough that I could catch up to him and walk beside him. "Will you be all right while we're gone?" he asked quietly, comfortingly.

"Yeah, don't worry about me," I modestly assured. "I suppose I gotta get used to it sooner or later, I can't be with you all the time. You just...be careful," I added, intejecting a note of concern into my voice.

"We will," he said, slowing even more. We came to a stop as far away from the others as we could get, though only Obi-Wan seemed to notice that we had left them. The snow was starting to fall a bit thicker now, with big, fluffy flakes that landed on our robes and dusted our hair. Qui-Gon faced me, his features lightening with a smile as he gazed down at me. "I'm glad you said you might offer to help Muira Goeben around the house," he casually commented. "That should help to keep your mind off us, for a while at least. Remember to meditate, just a little if you can manage. And if Master Adi needs you..."

"She already knows I'm available to help," I interrupted, smiling. "As long as I'm not asked to babysit, I think I'll be okay."

Nodding, the Master reached around behind him and pulled something from his belt, but he maintained eye contact with me as he did so. Lowering his voice, he murmured, "Don't look down. I'm going to give you something, but I don't want anyone to realize I am. Keep this to yourself, and only give it to Adi if there's an emergency." He reached out and took both of my hands in his, holding them gently as if saying a fond farewell, but I felt the caress of his fingers in my palm and then the cold touch of metal. He faked a pretty good smile as he continued to explain. "This contains the information on which direction we are heading, and a basic outline of my plans. No one knows them, not even Adi, because of the risk of a spy getting a hold of them. I recorded it this afternoon. Keep it with you at all times, let no one know you have this."

I nodded, resisting the urge to look down and see what it was. "I will."

Qui-Gon's large hands gave mine a firm squeeze before letting go, and he turned to walk again, laying one hand on my shoulder to guide me alongside him. He spoke even more quietly and urgently now. "You have your comlink, right? Good. Keep that with you, too. If anything happens to us, instructions on what to do are there as well. I should think you won't have to use those, however."

"No, you guys will be fine," I agreed, confidence returning. No, Master, it's not your time.

"Then, I think we're ready. But be wary. I don't trust anyone here, not even that Talz, as good-natured as he is." We walked the rest of the way in silence, the falling snow tickling my face and fluttering on my eyelashes. I tucked the hand with the metal object into my pants pocket, fingering it lightly. It felt like circuitry. Master Qui-Gon strode directly up to Obi-Wan, and the others turned to look at us. "How do the speeders look, Padawan?"

"They will do, Master," Obi-Wan replied, a smile in his eyes. He was itching to hop on one of those bikes, I could tell. "Is everything ready?"

"Yes. We must be off, we have a long way to go before morning." The Master gave my shoulder one more caress before withdrawing his hand and facing the others. "Thank you for your help, Colin, and Gotach can convey my gratitude to the militia."

"Of course," Colin nodded, handing over his last bit of loaned supplies - long gray cloaks, such as the kind the militia wore, which the two Jedi would wear over their robes to conceal themselves in the white snow fields. Qui-Gon slung his over his shoulders immediately, and though not all of his dark robe was covered, it would do fine for camoflage while they needed it.

"We can maintain brief communications until you reach the war zone," Adi reminded as Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan moved to the speeders and each climbed aboard one. "Close to the border, communications are jammed. If you run into trouble..."

"We know what to do," Qui-Gon firmly assured, finding the gloves and helmet provided for him and pulling them on. "You will hear from us one way or another in a few days, if all goes well."

Adi nodded her head once. "I will be waiting."

"May the Force be with you," I said timidly.

Both men looked at me and smiled, and Qui-Gon bobbed his head in acknowledgement of the serious blessing. The speeders started up, and without any further word or fanfare, whined out of the yard and into the street. The dense mountain air stifled the sound of their passing immediately, and I found myself left without my only friends in the whole galaxy.

Since it was getting pretty late, there was nothing more to do except get ready for bed. Adi excused herself to the refresher to shower, so I flopped down on the bed with my journal to make a few notes. Remembering the odd exchange from Qui-Gon, I dug in my pocket and pulled out the thing he had secretively given to me. It was a chip from a comlink, the kind that could be recorded in advance and then inserted into the data node at the bottom of the comlink for playback. Kind of like the one Qui-Gon uses to do the midi-chlorian test, I remembered. I turned it over in my fingers a few times, finally understanding what he had meant when he gave it to me. He had used his comlink to record his plans, and then removed the chip and left it in my care. My care! That meant he trusted me above even a fellow Jedi Master - and that scared me. If he didn't want this information falling into the wrong hands, then of all people, Adi should be the one carrying it, not me! What if someone captures me and tries to get information out of me? But the more I fretted about that, the more I realized Qui-Gon's reasoning was not flawed after all. Who, in all Droste, really knew who I was? I wasn't a Jedi, I attracted no attention, and would likely be spending the next few days holed up in the Goeben home being helpful. Adi would be the one out and about, attracting attention in Droste and probably shadowed by potential Tharin spies - if she wasn't being spied on already. My fear started to abate, and I chuckled to myself, feeling pretty important. I made it my objective not to let Qui-Gon down, and slipped the comlink chip into my pocket again. It would not leave my person until he and Obi-Wan got back.

Adi returned to our room and triggered the electronic lock on the door behind her, a move we agreed upon even before Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan left. She moved about the room getting ready for bed in silence, while I sat jotting down a few observations in my journal, mostly an expression of the odd feeling of being alone and yet not. I could still feel a light tingle at the edges of my senses, a feeling of fullness in the imagined center of my heart, which I figured was due to the bond with the absent Jedi. I could feel them, subtly and distantly, and realized that that feeling existed within me constantly - but having them near me or with me dulled my perception of it. Only in their absence could I sense the bond directly if I applied my senses to it. As I sat pondering it, the tall Jedi Master glided over to the bed alcove and smiled down at me. "Is that a travel log of some kind you're keeping?"

"Sort of. Journal, observations, a few sketches," I answered with a modest smile.

"A good idea." Adi nudged past me and sat at the foot-end of the bed, leaning up against the wall and stretching her long legs out in front of her. "How have you been? I haven't had the time to ask Qui-Gon how the retreat went."

"It went fine," I offered, setting aside my notebook and turning to face her. "We just happened to arrive at the time of a Chadra-Fan festival. It was a lot of fun."

"A festival?" Adi laughed. "Oh dear. That had to be interesting. I've met a few Chadra-Fan, I can only imagine what Qui-Gon must have thought of their festival."

I grinned. "If you ask me, he enjoyed it. We went a couple of times, walked around the marketplace and stuff. And we had a party at the retreat center to thank the town for being so hospitable to the Jedi."

Master Adi's elegant eyebrows raised in astonishment. "A party? Qui-Gon?" She shook her head. "That's incredible. I'm beginning to think you might be having an effect on him after all."

I instinctively began to deny it. "The party wasn't my idea! The Chadra-Fan caretaker for the temple was the one who suggested it. She's pretty persuasive. It was funny watching her needle Qui-Gon."

"I don't mean about the party. Overall." Adi smiled good-naturedly. "I have known Master Qui-Gon a number of years, and lately he has been working himself diligently into a rut. He did need a moment to himself, where he didn't have to think about missions or the well-being of anyone but himself. I suppose," she added wryly, "he didn't even accomplish that level of self-absorbtion, with you around to watch out for."

I shrugged stiffly. "Well, he told the Council before we left that he'd be using the retreat to find out how deep my Force-sensitivity runs. It gave him something to do."

"And how deep does it run?"

"I don't really know. Ask Qui-Gon."

Adi nodded. "I will, perhaps when we leave Salji to return to Coruscant. He taught you some things, you said?" I nodded this time. "In terms of the Force, or merely self-defense?"

"Both." I briefly explained the exercises I had practiced, and told a few stories from the retreat, such as the instant my Jedi reflexes kicked in and being able to remote-view Obi-Wan during the Race. Master Adi listened carefully, not asking any questions, though a curious look remained on her face. I concluded by saying, "Qui-Gon's been encouraging me to meditate, even though I really don't know much about how to do it. He thinks my sensitivity is growing."

Adi peered thoughtfully at me. "I'm inclined to believe him, though this growth has not opened your mind to me yet. It sounds as though he's conducting this properly. Who knows? Maybe with more time and effort you will be blank to the rest of us no longer."

"Who knows?" I repeated, smirking a little. It wasn't something I was eagerly hoping for, but at the same time, my presence would cause less trouble among the Jedi Council if they could sense it. I got up to change into sleep clothes. "I'm not sensitive enough to be a Jedi, that's for sure."

"You're too old to be trained anyway," Adi smirked back.

I acknowledged that with a smile and went about my business, quickly changing and folding my pants so that the pocket containing the comm chip was hidden safely inside. I tucked my clothes away in the bag, taking a moment to run my fingers over the top of the box containing the whistle. A pang of longing struck me, wishing Qui-Gon were there, but it passed like a cloud over the sun and the warmth of the bond returned. Imagining my Jedi companions to be racing along the snowy slopes of the mountains, somewhere halfway to Thara by now, I pulled the tie from my hair, releasing the ponytail, and climbed into bed. Making sure to put a comfortable personal space between myself and Adi, I rolled over and pulled one of the spare pillows to me. It was Obi-Wan's, it carried his spicy scent. Smiling contentedly, I reached up and tapped off the light.

I spent a full day inside the Goeben home doing little except catching up in my journal and pretending to play with the young children, while my mind constantly turned to Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan and where they might be. Had they crossed the border safely? Were they trekking through the wooded mountains or had they gone into a settlement? Did they find someplace warm and dry to sleep? No communication had come from them since their departure, which Adi said we should expect, so I tried not to wonder too much. As intended, I offered to help Muira with the housework or meals or something, but she vehemently declined, saying a guest should not have to worry about it. The children were enthralled with having a new friend hanging around the house, though, so I kept the little ones out of their mother's hair while she busied herself. Saljan women, I observed, were truly the leaders of the household. Muira handled all of the family's finances and made most of the decisions, and directed her children and the house-servant as to the chores both indoors and out. While the kids took an afternoon nap, and Muira sat at the dining room table poring over financial records, I sat with her, toying idly with my journal and talking about the way of things on Salji. I asked her how anyone could stand year-round cold and snow, and she asked me if trees on other planets really did shed their leaves and grow them back. It was a fascinating time, hardly as boring as I thought it would be. Master Adi spent most of the day out, as usual, coming back at nightfall with Colin for dinner and retiring shortly after.

The following day, the most extraordinary and astonishing thing happened: one of Adi's Tharin contacts actually contacted her.

It was fairly early in the morning, and the sun had broken through the ever-present blanket of storm clouds for once. Light reflected glaringly off the snow and into the windows of the Goeben home, making me squint as I came downstairs to breakfast. Adi was already up, dressed, and at the communicator having a heated discussion with someone, though I didn't eavesdrop on it. Colin was standing beside the table, holding a hot mug of tea but hardly drinking from it, watching Adi warily with an urgent expression on his face. "What's going on?" I asked him.

"Communication with Thara has been re-established," he said quietly.

I perked up. "Is that Qui-Gon?"

Colin shook his head. "No, we still haven't heard from them, though that's no surprise. Someone Adi knows." But that was all he said until the Jedi Master finished her conversation and closed off the communications channel. She came into the dining room and mustered the typical blank Master-Jedi-look. "What is it?" Colin asked her.

"Good news, actually," Adi replied, taking a seat at the end of the table. "There's been a break in the fighting."

The Saljan visibly brightened. "A break? They've stopped fighting? Oh...that is good news."

Adi nodded, the tendrils of her headpiece swaying about her face. "It seems fighting abruptly ceased along the border during the night, and a lull has settled in. Both sides are wary, because neither has moved forward to offer cease-fire or peace, but communication and transport has resumed in the war zones. At least, that is the report." She waved a hand toward Colin. "You should see if the Revin militia has any further information, if traffic has indeed resumed near and over the border."

"Yes, I'll call Gotach and see what the intelligence reports have to say," he agreed.

"Qui-Gon said fighting tends to stop and start without warning at the border," I remembered. "Is this...communications thing, normal?"

"Actually, no," Colin answered. "Fighting does start and stop randomly, but communication hasn't been re-established in many weeks. This is very good news, I just hope it isn't a false break. Any step toward a permanent cease-fire is welcome to me."

"Yes, we can hope," Master Adi said curtly. "But we also have a problem on our hands."

"Oh? What's that?" both Colin and I said.

"My Tharin contact knows Qui-Gon and young Kenobi are in his country."

Colin's arms fell to his sides and his mouth fell open. I sat up sharply, my heart clenching in my chest in fear. "How does he know?" I demanded. "Did he see them?"

Adi shook her head. "No, he has not seen them himself, but the fact that he brought it up, telling me that he heard it all over the back-streets of Este, worries me. Este is a large settlement near the border," she explained for me, "and anything heard there will likely be spread the length of Thara within twenty-four hours." She sat back in her chair, crossing one leg over the other and fixing both Colin and I with one of her Jedi Council-type aloof, thoughtful stares even as Colin sank to a seat on the bench, across the table from me. "My contact claims to know that there are two Jedi abroad in Thara - Jedi who were not summoned and are not there on official business, who somehow made it into the country without using any border checkpoints. I did my best to deny it, but if rumors are spreading already, it will not be long before someone finds them. They are in grave danger."

I folded my arms on the table and stared at my breakfast, uninterested in finishing it. Colin leaned on the table and fixed Adi with a serious look. "Does your contact know why the two Jedi might be there?"

"Meaning Niall? No," she replied. "Not from what he said to me, anyway. I told him to call me again if he hears anything more, I should be very interested in this kind of information."

"Weren't they planning on coming back tomorrow? I thought they were only spending a couple of days over there."

"I don't know," Adi said with a shake of her head. "I am not aware of Master Qui-Gon's plans."

I thought of the comm chip in my pocket, whose weight I could feel against my leg, but didn't say anything about it. Maybe this qualified as the "emergency" Qui-Gon spoke of, but I needed to know more.

Colin shrugged a little. "Master Qui-Gon is a capable man, I don't think the danger is as grave as it seems. It is likely he has also heard about the break in the fighting, and may take advantage of it to get back soon."

"Perhaps." Adi flicked her gaze to me for a moment, and then returned it to Colin. "I need more information before I can decide whether to act. Call Gotach. I will attempt to raise some of my other contacts by comlink."

They disappeared to their respective communications, leaving me there at the table, no longer hungry and feeling a creeping sense of fear. Adi gave me a kind look before getting up, as if she wanted to say something placating but having nothing to say. Muira wandered in and wondered if she could get me anything, but I just said, "No, thanks," and excused myself to the guest room.

Once alone, I took the chip from my pocket and looked at it, fingering it thoughtfully. Adi didn't know Qui-Gon's plans. Neither did I, really, but I had the information she needed. Unsure how to give it to her without looking like I was withholding it from her, I paced in the room fretting for a bit, and then decided to do what Qui-Gon did when he needed answers. Standing in the middle of the room, I closed my eyes and tried to quiet my wired, confused mind, searching out for the tangible Force, hoping it would at least provide a calm head so I could think. Once my senses had dropped out of use and the Force held control of them, I concentrated on the bond I shared with the Jedi, since it was as clear and present as ever. I reflexively caressed it as though cherishing a keepsake, idly wondering how the two of them were doing. In that instant I could sense Qui-Gon, distantly, feeling only that he was alive and well. Any connection to Obi-Wan was harder to establish, and nothing came back to me along the bond, but I could sense that nothing was wrong. They were far away, but fine. That was enough for me, so I roused myself and went to look for Master Adi.

It was some time before I found her, because she had left the house to meet up with someone. She returned within the space of an hour with Colin in tow, striding briskly into the house, her large, dark eyes smoldering with urgency. "Now will you tell me what you know?" Colin begged her as soon as the door closed.

"Patience, Colin," she cautioned. "It wasn't safe to talk about it on the streets. Now is the time and place for it."

"Master Adi -" I tried to say.

Adi held up a hand to me. "Just a moment. Colin, what I said earlier is the truth. Qui-Gon and his apprentice are in grave danger, and I have confirmed that the Tharin are aware that they have crossed into their territory."

"Has anyone actually seen or spoken with them?" Colin pressed. The Jedi Master was forced to shake her head no. "You see? They are keeping themselves out of harm's way."

Adi sighed shortly. "Colin, if the leader of your army received a report of Jedi sneaking about in Reva without official authorization, what would he do? Let them go about their business?"

The Saljan's face sobered. "No," he said morosely. "Any report of anyone who doesn't belong in Reva is treated the same. The border is closed, the spaceports are monitored, and a systematic search is begun until they are found and arrested."

Adi folded her arms over her chest. "You can expect the Tharin to do the same."

"What do you propose to do, then?"

The Master gazed seriously at him. "Go into Thara after them."

Startled, I clenched my fists, one of which closed on the comm chip. I found myself blurting out, "Adi, wait!" She turned slowly to me, gazing down at me with mingled surprise and sternness. I drew the fist with the chip out of its pocket and held it out to her. "Before he left Qui-Gon gave me this. It's a recording of his plans. I didn't listen to it, I was just keeping it like he told me to. He said to give it to you in case of an emergency, and...well, I think this is an emergency all right."

The surprise became obvious in Adi's face, and she held out a hand to take the chip. Glancing at it briefly, she tucked it into her belt. "Thank you. I will listen to it before I make any solid plans. But this doesn't change my mind, I still believe we must go into Thara and pick up Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan before the Tharin can get to them. The longer they stay there," she added darkly, "the more likely it is that they will become the hunted rather than the hunters."

"You're just as crazy as Master Qui-Gon," Colin sniped. "Who's going to go? Not you." Adi narrowed her eyes in challenge, but Colin only gestured for all of us to sit down. He spoke more tactfully as he went on, "You're too well-known, Master Adi. Even the Tharin know who you are. You couldn't cross into Thara without them knowing that you had a reason, likely a hidden one since no one there has called for you to meet with them. They would stop you, maybe even kill you."

"Then, we shall send someone who wouldn't attract any attention," Adi countered, leaning on the table to confront her friend. "Is there anyone you know who can cross the border freely?"

"Several. Mostly off-worlders," he answered. "But you can't just try to describe the Jedi and send someone over to look for them. Not even Whiphid hunters will do that - and you don't want any Whiphid hunters finding our friends," Colin warned. "Someone who knows them has to go."

"But, very few here in Droste even know that Qui-Gon was here, much less what he looks like. But you won't go, and I can't go..."

I was sitting across the table from Adi, quietly listening to the debate, but as her voice trailed off and her head turned in my direction, I felt my eyes get very wide. "No," I breathed. "Hold on, I..."

"Of course," Colin said as if remembering a simple answer to a simple question. "She knows them very well, and no one in Thara knows who she is. She would attract very little attention - she even passes for a Tharin! With the lighter hair and the rounder features..."

"I can't go!" I yelped. "You're talking about sending me into...into a war zone!"

"I'm not sure this is a good idea, Colin," Master Adi said cautiously.

"Who better than Master Qui-Gon's friend?" the man offered. "You can't send a Revin. They won't let just anyone cross the border, even now. Someone with no ties here would do best, and for the Jedi's sake, it should be someone who knows them really well. Or am I wrong?"

"I don't believe this," I muttered. "You can't send me, I'm not ready for this."

Adi gazed sympathetically at me, but I could see in her eyes and her face that she wasn't opposed to the suggestion. "Someone does need to go," she mused, thinking aloud it seemed to me. "If I could merely send a message I would do so, but it would be dangerous to communicate openly with them. As soon as I listen to Master Qui-Gon's recording, I want to draw up a simple plan and send a rescue party off immediately. Time is of the essence, I don't want to wait for anything." Her searching eyes focused on me, and she quieted her voice to speak sweetly. "I know this is a strange place to you, and I agree that it is dangerous. But...we are running short of options. We don't have the time to acquaint someone with Qui-Gon's appearance and habits, we need to send someone who knows him, and knows him well. Would you say that you do?"

She had a very valid point. "Yeah...I feel like I know him and Obi-Wan very well," I reluctantly answered. "And they know me."

"I know just who to send with her," Colin interrupted swiftly. "Someone who's not involved with the war and has his own speeder to pilot. I couldn't think of anyone better to send."

Adi ignored him for a moment, focusing her expressive eyes and solemn face on me. "Under most circumstances, I would not even be considering this idea. But it is logically sound, and our best option at the moment. Colin can find someone to drive the transport. All you have to do is accompany this person into Thara and be the eyes and ears, find Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan and get them back over the border. With no way to get a message to Qui-Gon," she added, "I know of no one else who could convince him that he was in danger. Seeing you will encourage him to come back."

"Yeah, yeah," I sighed. "You're right."

"The choice is still yours, you can say no."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, reminding myself, fear is the path to the Dark Side. "Okay. I'll go."

The Jedi Master nodded once in acceptance. "Be ready to leave in an hour."

I ran upstairs to change into warmer layers of clothing, unsure whether the trip would find me mostly outdoors or indoors or some combination of both, and put everything else of mine in order. I knew I wouldn't need my journal nor anything else in my bag, but I made sure the comlink was safe with me in a deep pocket. Before I could head back downstairs to meet up with anyone, Master Adi came into the room, and eyed the brown robe lying on the bed. "No, not that," she said immediately. "You will not look like a Tharin if you wear that. We'll borrow a coat from the Goebens, surely one of their sons has an extra that would fit you."

I reluctantly agreed to it, because I liked the robe, but not attracting attention was the greater need at the moment. Sure enough, there was an old gray coat that once belonged to one of Colin's teen sons that fit me fine, and made me look like a Saljan once I bundled up with scarf and gloves. Adi had listened to Qui-Gon's message, and now threw around orders like a captain. Well before an hour had even fully passed I was following her down the street, pulling the scarf up over my nose and lips to protect from the sharp cold that had settled in. We wandered around the twisting streets for a while, until we came to a garage-like building somewhere toward the outskirts. A couple of strangers loitered about, all of them wrapped in long coats or cloaks to protect against the cold except for a tall, furry being who had no need of coats and mittens. As we approached, one of the men turned and his shoulders sagged in relief. It was Colin. "Good, are we all set?" he asked, more to Adi than to me.

"We should be," the Jedi answered.

"Ready as I'll ever be," I muttered darkly.

Colin showed no sign of hearing me. "This is Stacey, a friend of the Jedi," he introduced to his friends hanging around the speeder parked in the garage. "She's agreed to go."

Standing beside him was the first Wookiee I had ever seen up close, a tall, brawny creature with long brown and black fur and long arms that looked more than capable of pulling peoples' arms out of their sockets. He eyed me with curiosity, and I felt uncomfortable because I couldn't take my eyes off him. It was thrilling and frightening to be meeting a real Wookiee, seeing the patient humanity in his eyes contrasted with the peculiar furry face they were framed in. Colin was still introducing. "This the Wookiee friend I was telling you about," he said to me with a wry smile. "He'll be taking you into Thara."

I grinned nervously. "And he is...?"

"Well..." Colin looked sheepish. "His name's too hard to pronounce, so we call him Mowchie."

The Wookiee's lips curled in a toothy grin, and he opened his mouth to speak, but instead of the usual yowling I expected, a clear Basic came out in a growl. "Mochiwyya isn't hard. But, for you..." He clapped a paw to his chest and bowed to me. "...I permit Mowchie."

"Nice to meet you, Mowchie," I said, starting to relax a little. The timbre of his voice was that thin, reedy growl that I was accustomed to, like Chewbacca, but I could otherwise understand him just fine. "You...uh, ready for this?"

"It was about time I took an adventure," Mowchie quipped, grinning and showing his pointed teeth again. "I have supplies, just need to load you in and find out where I am going."

Adi instantly fell to the latter task, handing a datapad to the Wookiee pilot and hurriedly explaining which areas Qui-Gon had intended to search, where her contacts had called from, and what the latest reports seemed to indicate. I half-listened, climbing into the passenger seat of the little speeder, which had more in common structurally with a spacious car than a space vehicle. There was room for four including the pilot, and a sort of arm-rest and instrument panel separated his seat from mine. Mowchie listened to everything Adi said, and then climbed in behind the steering mechanism. Master Adi leaned into the hatch after him. "All told, you shouldn't take more than a day looking for them," she said, nearing the end of her discourse. "If you haven't found them by this time tomorrow, come back. Don't wait, don't press the task if it can't be carried out. We don't know how long this break will last, we can't trust it."

"Border guards will not stop Mowchie," he blithely assured with a wave of his paw. "Those on both sides know me well, I was here before they were born and will likely be here well after they have killed each other."

"Colin says you have no ties to either Thara or Reva."

"He is correct. I have friends on both sides, but in the matter of their war I am not involved. Everyone knows this. As I say, border guards will not stop me. They have no reason to."

"Good." Adi shifted her eyes to me. "Be mindful. Take no risks. Mowchie will get you where you need to go, just keep an eye out for Qui-Gon and try not to catch all Thara's attention when you find him."

"I will," I assured as honestly as I could.

She nodded. "May the Force be with you."

Mowchie growled in approval, and began hitting switches. The hatches slid closed and the repulsorlift engines fired up, thrumming raggedly in the cold, crisp air. Nervousness made my heart clench tightly, but there was nothing I could do now. It was up to me to sneak into enemy territory and try to contact the Jedi before any Tharin found them and dragged them to prison for spying. "Oh, man," I involuntarily complained.

"I know it sounds rough, but I assure you, the engines are tuned," Mowchie said. "We will be fine." I smiled, realizing he thought my nervousness was due to the state of his speeder. Good, I said to myself, he can think that all he wants. He guided the speeder out of the garage and into the street, and before long we were humming along the trackless, snow-covered roads at a speed I guessed to be well over a hundred miles an hour. Tree-clad slopes and the much-maligned territory of Thara lay ahead of us, and the peace and safety planned for me was far behind. It looked to me like Qui-Gon's insistence that I had a purpose was right after all.

On to part 21

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