I murmured and grumbled incoherently at him, burying my face in my pillow. Not to be outdone, Qui-Gon stepped closer to the bed and threw open the heavy curtains over the window. Hot sunlight poured onto my bed and into my senses, causing me to flinch and finally look up at him. He stood next to the bed, already dressed in everything but his robe, a look of mild amusement on his face. "What?" I growled.

"I wish for you to meditate with us," he explained simply, and turned toward the door.

I rolled over and strangled my pillow. "I don't want to."

"It is essential to developing your sensitivity to the Force."

"I already told you I don't care about that," I tried to reason, hoping desperately that he'd go away and close the curtains before he did, so I could get another hour of sleep.

"It doesn't matter. Come." His voice was already retreating, but his tone gave no leeway for further argument. Sighing in frustration, I threw back the covers and climbed out of bed, deciding not to get dressed before heading out to the sitting room where the Jedi waited. Obi-Wan smiled in welcome as I joined them, but none of us spoke as we all settled into the customary kneeling position, this time facing each other in a sort of circle.

Unsure what else to do as the Force began to wrap itself around my mind and tickle me with its elusive presence, I tried focusing my concentration on the slender thread pulsing back and forth between me and my two companions. I wanted to examine its every nuance, curious if the nature of the bond had changed at all with the events of the past day. As far as I could tell, though, it was as it had been all along. As strong as ever, vibrant and pliant, waiting to be used to sense any of the other parties involved. I stretched out along its length and touched Qui-Gon's mind gently, interested what I'd find now that I had woken up and forgiven him for the early intrusion. He seemed tense, uncertain, but at peace with himself nonetheless, as if he had resigned himself to some sort of conclusion but was unsure if it was the right one. The uncertainty made me shrink back from him, not wanting to encroach any further, and reach for Obi-Wan instead. The presence of the young apprentice was bright like fire, but held some hint of being undecided about something. But in neither of them did I find anger, resentment, or sadness, and was relieved. It was good to know our friendship might be salvaged out of this after all.

Over breakfast, Qui-Gon asked me if I was feeling better, but otherwise did not touch on what had happened last night. He seemed himself again, wearing that slight, ambiguous smile, peacefully listening to everything I and Obi-Wan had to say, even if we only accused each other of being the one to eat the last of the sweet ice for a midnight snack. Qui-Gon didn't care, but Shassa had a thing or two to say about sneaking into the kitchen and leaving a mess. "Well," came the Master's inevitable comment after the Chadra-Fan caretaker hustled off to take care of other things, "it sounds as if things have improved."

"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan humbly acknowledged. "Sleeping on it has helped my...outlook." He glanced at me, and the little smile on his face clued me in to what he was thinking about. Not sleeping. Something else.

Qui-Gon seemed not to notice, his thoughtful gaze trained less on the two of us facing him and more on the far wall. "Well, then. Under the circumstances, I think our retreat has fulfilled its purpose. I have healed from my injury. I have evaluated your progress, Padawan, and am pleased at what I will report to the Masters. And progress has also been made with Stacey." A smile again, and a little chuckle. "What the Council will think of my report, I don't know. I don't plan to contact them today, I wish to give us some more time to ourselves. I think we shall do nothing for a few days but rest and enjoy the peace."

Peace? I wanted to question. You call sitting here not talking about what happened yesterday peace? But if so, it was a peace I was willing to live with for now. I did not think of Qui-Gon as the sort to dwell in denial, or I would have suspected that to be his motive. No, his way was always the way of patience. Wait, give it time. Act only when the moment to act comes around. That was what caused us to sit there around the breakfast table, talking about any and every other subject than the explosion of emotions the night before that had nearly shattered our trust in one another. Nevertheless, it was on our minds. The way Obi-Wan kept glancing shyly at me proved that clearly enough.

*****

With a warm summer's day baking the hills and fields outside, it was a pleasure to have nothing to do but relax and enjoy the peaceful serenity of the Jedi center. I seated myself on a windowsill in our quarters and let the wind and the still-cold stone of the temple walls cool me. Though the air was warm, the polished stone retained its chill. "This is nice," I remarked as I leaned against the window, smiling casually at Obi-Wan as he paced slowly through the room. "Too bad we ate up the rest of the sweet ice, it would go good right about now."

"Perhaps we could ask Shassa to go into Kalinda and find us more?" the apprentice suggested, heading in my direction.

Across the room, seated in a comfortable chair with a datapad in hand, Qui-Gon overheard and chuckled a little. "I would think a walk into Kalinda would do you more good than it would Shassa," he offered.

Obi-Wan glanced at him, smirking. "If you send me, I'm sure I would have it all eaten by the time I returned," he said, giving me a playful smile. I giggled at him. He leaned his shoulder against the frame of the window in which I sat. "That would hardly be fair, would it?"

"Oh, hardly," I agreed. "Besides, too much sweet ice is bad for your figure."

"Is it?" Obi-Wan's blue eyes seemed to travel away from my face for a moment, but he didn't make any comments about what he was looking at, or looking for. Instead, he leaned closer and lowered his voice so that Qui-Gon could not hear. The Master was far across the sitting room, engrossed in whatever he had discovered to read, and likely was not eavesdropping anyway. Obi-Wan's question came without any preface whatsoever. "Stacey, why did you kiss me last night?"

I stared at him, at his cautious, questioning look, and felt the heat stealing into my cheeks immediately. What seemed so easy to say in my mind was impossible to voice, so a long silence greeted the question until I could come up with the right answer. This is going to sound so cheesy, I worried. "I like you, Obi-Wan," I finally said, almost whispering. "I didn't want you going around thinking I don't."

His eyebrows lifted in wonder. "What do you mean?"

I hated to bring it up, but it was necessary. "Yesterday, you were upset because you thought I didn't share your feelings, that it was hopeless, right?" He nodded slowly, his eyes still wide and questioning. I continued in a secretive murmur. "That's not the case at all. I do have feelings for you."

The Padawan stared, several things flickering in his blue-green eyes all at once. "But...I thought..." He glanced at Qui-Gon again, who sat with his back to us, completely oblivious. Obi-Wan returned to me, confused. "I don't understand."

I sat up and leaned over to him, whispering in his ear. "I can't help it. I like both of you."

For a moment the young apprentice did nothing. His eyes had fallen, his downcast features struggling with amazement and confusion. He blinked rapidly, frowning. Then, a hesitant smile touched his lips as he looked back up to me. "Well," he remarked, at a normal level. "That is interesting."

I leaned back against the window and smiled down at him. "Doesn't help things much, I know, but hey. At least you know."

Obi-Wan nodded, and turned so he could lean his back against the window frame. I could tell there was more on his mind that he wanted to say, or express, but he closed himself down and retreated into the safety of private thoughts with his face turned away so I couldn't see it. Neither of us said anything more to each other, but relaxed at the touch of the warm summer breeze and enjoyed the quiet. I glanced up and found Qui-Gon facing us, watching us, a vague smile on his face. It seemed to me the three of us were just going to sit there and stare at each other, but the Master rose smoothly from his chair and set aside the datapad. "Obi-Wan." He inclined his head in a beckoning gesture. "Walk with me."

"Yes, Master." The Padawan gave me a quick look, with a smile that made him look like a child being sent to the principal's office, as he moved away from the window.

Qui-Gon waited patiently for Obi-Wan to join him, and then shifted his glance to me. "Will you be all right by yourself for a while?"

"Of course. I can entertain myself."

Qui-Gon nodded, and then turned to go, his apprentice a step behind him, their robes floating along behind them. I heard their footsteps in the main hall, and then lost them, but figured they had either gone into the rooms on the far side or possibly outside. I hopped off the windowsill and went to my room to freshen up and change my shirt. Our quarters were silent, and rather boring, so I made my way out onto the patio to bask in the sunshine. I hopped up onto the balustrade and sat with my feet dangling over the edge, gazing outward at the lake and thinking it looked just as lovely now as it did at night, with the wan moonlight, and the raindrops, and Obi-Wan...

I chuckled to myself, wondering how in the world I could have missed the obvious signs just days before. A voice behind me made me gasp and nearly lose my balance. "Laughing at nothing, eh? Sign of a good mood, I think."

I looked over my shoulder as Shassa stepped out onto the patio, wiping her paws on a towel. She had been in and out, back and forth all day, it was no surprise to see her here. "I wasn't laughing at nothing," I defended, "it was just...a thought."

"Ah, yes yes. Always just a thought." She came over and leaned on the balustrade, winking up at me. "And who would this thought be about?"

"Who said it was about anybody in particular?"

The Chadra-Fan snorted, but decided not to argue. "At least, is good to see you in a good mood again, I say." I looked down at her, wondering, and she met my frown with a wise look. "Everybody was in a bad mood yesterday. All my senses told me, 'Shassa, is nothing good coming about here.' But all is different now."

Great, she knows about yesterday. "We're okay, Shassa. Nothing's wrong."

"No, not now. But, is not my business. I'm no gossip, I care not to know. Does not concern me. So! You having a pleasant time? Probably not going to the haridi, no?"

"Not if it's going to be wild, like you said."

"Oh, is wild all right. I had chance to speak to Kazik yesterday, he asked my advice about inviting Jedi to his great clan party the last night, but I warned him no." The caretaker grinned a toothy little grin. "I been to one of those parties, once. Made my head swim. If an old Chadra-Fan cannot stand the revelry, then Jedi would certainly disapprove."

I snorted. "I'll bet." A short pause gave me a chance to change the subject. "You're not really mad that me and Obi-Wan ate up the last of the sweet ice, are you?"

"Ohhh of course not," Shassa laughed kindly. "Is my mother-nature. Good little kits don't sneak food in the middle of the night. You and Jedi Obi-Wan, though, you old enough to take care of yourselves. Don't blame you. Crystalberry is very very good."

"That it is," I admitted with a grin.

While we talked, I glanced up and noticed that Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were walking past the temple down along the shoreline. They seemed to be head-to-head in some sort of deep discussion, and had decided to take a walk along the lake to facilitate that discussion. As they came around the bend and continued along the path, Qui-Gon glanced toward the temple and saw that Shassa and I were on the patio, and smiled in greeting. Obi-Wan, noting his Master's sudden distraction, also glanced our way and smiled. Then, they put their heads down and continued on their way, pacing slowly, solemn and thoughtful. I kept my smile long after they had disappeared into the brush again, and Shassa clicked her tongue warningly. "I know that look," she muttered good-naturedly, pausing to sniff the air. "Does not take a Jedi to know what you thinking when you look at them that way."

"You don't understand," I said under my breath.

"Course not. I have not the eyes nor the heart to appreciate a fine human male when I see one. Chadra-Fan, now...don't get me started!" Shassa cackled delightedly. "I may be an old one, but I still have the eyes to see, I promise you!" I laughed at that, trying not to wonder what constituted a fine Chadra-Fan male. Shassa kept chattering. "I suppose, though. Jedi are heroes, attract a lot of attention, eh? And which one catches your eye, my friend? I would guess the young Obi-Wan, I would...sure, he has good looks. I know some of my much younger female kin at the party noticed, even though he is a human. Hmm?" She looked up at me with her black eyes twinkling.

I looked away from her, but smirked knowingly. "Maybe," I replied with a lilt to imply that she wasn't quite correct.

"What you mean, maybe? Is or isn't, no maybe about it," Shassa protested. "Unless..."

"What?" I challenged, looking down at her again.

"Only one thing besides yes or no, that is a yes, but. And if you saying 'yes...but' about them, then..." The Chadra-Fan shook her head furiously. "Not both!"

"And why not?" I wondered. "Is there some law against appreciating two men at the same time?"

"Well, no." Shassa thought about it, and then burst into a squealing chuckle. "In fact," she managed to gasp out after a moment of thoroughly indulging herself, "is a lot like an old legend I know. The legend of the seasons. A beautiful maiden fell in love with two spirits, the spirit of the waters and the spirit of the winds. And both are fine males, both good to the Chadra-Fan and splendid in appearance, so the legends say. But the maiden, you see, she could not make up her mind which to choose to marry, so she chose both! Half the year she spends with the spirit of the winds, and Kalinda is dry and things grow. Then half the year she spends with the spirit of the waters, and Kalinda is wet." She snickered under her breath. "Of course, no believing that really is the case, but the legend is no less wise. And many still joke that when the rains linger, the maiden is having too much fun with the spirit of the waters to come back." She kept giggling, but I chose not to comment until she was through. "I suppose is possible. In the matters of the heart, is no such thing as rules, I guess. Ah, but I speak as though I know all. There are others far wiser than I in these things." Shassa reached up and patted my leg as she turned to go. "I'll leave you to your thoughts. Is more I must get done before I go home. Boys want to go to the haridi tonight," she added, muttering, as she crossed the patio and went inside. "Too much for me, too wild. No no, mother Shassa must watch the young ones..."

I grinned at her grumbling retreat before returning my attention to the sunlit view. The Jedi were nowhere to be seen, I figured they were probably halfway around the lake by now. I wondered what in particular Qui-Gon wanted to talk to Obi-Wan about, that he would want the privacy of a walk in which to discuss it. Then again, the more ideas I came up with to answer my own wonderings, the less I wanted to know the truth, and decided to wonder about other things.

No more than a few minutes passed while I engrossed myself in wandering thought, during which the lawn and the lakeside fell into a noticeable hush. As I sat there on the railing of the patio with the sun warming my shoulders, gazing idly at the view, I heard something strange. It sounded like it was coming from somewhere behind me, behind the temple, a distant and subtle growl as of thunder. I even looked up at the sky to see if there were storm clouds that might have brought it about, but no, the pale lavender-blue bore very few clouds at all. Unlike thunder, though, it didn't subside, and then I imagined it might be a ship landing in the Kalinda spaceport. Another glance skyward told me that was also wrong. Birds suddenly shot from the trees along the lake with warning cries. The rumble grew louder, closer, and I felt a little tremble in the solid stone balustrade beneath me. I barely had time to ask myself "What the heck...?" before it was upon me, shaking the ground, the trees, the temple, and my body perched precariously on the railing. Where I lived on Earth there were train tracks, and I had endured the annoying tremor of trains going by for years, but this was completely unlike a passing train. The shaking originated deep below me, and was powerful enough to make the trees visibly sway and the waters of the lake churn like a cauldron boiling. I felt it through my seat and my hands, which I clenched on the balustrade to keep from falling. It was a most unnatural feeling, and my stomach knotted as I realized what it was. Quake sprang into my mind like an alarm even as I heard the clatter of stones falling from a great height and bouncing on the patio. I whipped around and looked up, and saw the ornamental trim on the roof of the Jedi center beginning to crumble in places. Stones thudded to the patio and smashed into pieces, some much too near for my safety. One fell smack onto the seat of one of the chairs, demolishing it completely. Without thinking I let go of the balustrade and half leaped, half fell onto the ground below, stumbling and rolling to a stop a few feet away from the bushes. The sickening trembling of the ground was worse now that I was sprawled on it, cowering with my arms curled around my head as if that would protect it from falling rocks. I could hear crashing inside the center, and the pervasive roar of the planet grinding itself together somewhere deep beneath the surface, but nothing else for what seemed like forever, and then it subsided.

I lay panting on the ground for a while longer, hoping it really was over, unwilling to remove the protection of my arms until I could be sure. The landscape around me was deathly still, as absent of noise as it has been full of it a moment ago. I lifted my arms and looked around, glad to see that no debris from the temple had fallen down to my position. The patio, though, was littered with crumbled stone, and sheets of the creeping vines hung off the back wall of the temple like torn wallpaper. I picked myself up and brushed myself off, finding my trousers stained with dirt and grass. Then I heard someone shouting my name, a familiar, deep voice raised strangely in alarm, gruff, strident, and loud. I had never heard it like that before. "Here, I'm over here!" I called back.

Qui-Gon appeared suddenly out of the trees, striding urgently in my direction. His hard gaze softened upon spotting me. "Are you all right?" he demanded concernedly as he came to a stop before me.

"Yeah, fine. A little dirty, maybe." I brushed myself off one more time and raised my elbows up to see if they were scratched. Qui-Gon looked around, and I looked up at him, trying to read his face, scared that he thought it would start up again. "Oh my gosh. I've never been through a quake before, that was...it was just not normal," I complained worriedly. "The ground's not supposed to move."

His hand came to rest on my shoulder, strong and reassuring. "It's all right, it's over now. You're safe."

"Master!" came a shout beyond us.

"Here, Obi-Wan!"

Obi-Wan abandoned the path and came bounding through the long grass, also looking rather relieved to find me in one piece. "Are you all right?" he asked anyway as he raced up the slope to where we stood.

"Yes, I'm fine. Really." I looked to Qui-Gon. "Are you?"

"Yes," he replied, glancing at his apprentice, who nodded in confirmation. "Well. That was...unexpected, to say the least. This is supposed to be a more stable region of Chad."

"The temple!" Obi-Wan interrupted as he looked up to see the extent of the damage. "Look at it. Half the roof has come down onto the deck."

"Half of it nearly crushed me," I exclaimed. Qui-Gon stared with alarm. "I jumped off the railing in time, I didn't get hit, but it was close."

"You could have been hurt," the Master noted with some worry. "But you did the right thing. It is dangerous to be near a building in a quake like that. And it was not a small one, I assure you."

I nodded, ready to agree just from feeling the ground buckling beneath me. Then, I looked sharply toward the temple door with a sinking feeling. "Where's Shassa?"

The Jedi both stared at me, realizing that the caretaker they had seen in my company earlier was no longer with me. Alarmed, Obi-Wan yelled, "Shassa!" as he raced up the patio steps and picked his way to the door, which hung wide open. Qui-Gon remained protectively at my side and looked around, narrowing his eyes as he summoned the use of the Force to hunt for movement, sound, life anywhere around the temple grounds. We then heard an urgent cry of, "Master!" from inside, and hurried to find Obi-Wan.

The Padawan knelt just inside the door to our quarters, reaching out to the still figure lying in a heap at his feet. Qui-Gon and I came to his side to find Shassa unconscious but breathing, blood matting the gray and brown fur of her head. A short decorative shelf had fallen off the wall and struck her as she ran for a doorway, Obi-Wan speculated, indicating a cracked wooden piece just beside Shassa. Master Qui-Gon gently smoothed the Chadra-Fan's fur away from her closed eyes and then focused the Force, brushing his hand over her head. Her eyes fluttered open and she moaned. "Hush," Qui-Gon implored, "don't try to speak."

"Jedi..." Shassa whispered feebly. "A tremor..."

"I know. It's over, we're all right," he said softly. "Can you move?"

Shassa shifted a little and let out a cry. "My head!"

Qui-Gon pressed a hand to her shoulder to keep her still. "Relax. It will be all right. Something fell and hit you." He quickly assessed her condition and found that it was safe enough to move her to a more comfortable place. There were many more guest rooms in this wing of the temple, so together he and Obi-Wan gently lifted the caretaker from the floor and carried her to a clean, soft bed in one of the other rooms. I ran at their bidding and brought water and towels from the kitchen to use as bandages. Qui-Gon worked without comment, binding the wound and making Shassa comfortable, while Obi-Wan and I stood aside and watched, wanting to help but staying out of the way. When he was finished, he plucked his comlink from his belt. "Your family, Shassa. Do they have a communicator of some sort?"

Shassa nodded weakly. "My sons. Can you contact them?"

"I will try." Qui-Gon adjusted some of the controls, and then sent a signal over the open frequency.

A few seconds of unbearable silence passed, and then a voice answered, sounding rushed. "Yes yes? Who is it?"

"Korin," Shassa breathed. "My eldest."

"Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn. Is this Korin?"

"Yes, Master Jedi. What is it? We have just had a tremor, you know -"

"Yes, and your mother is injured," Qui-Gon said shortly.

The other side paused. When Korin spoke again, his irritated urgency had evaporated. "Is it bad?"

"No. Just a knock on the head. But it would be best if you came to the Jedi center right away to see to her. I will need to go into Kalinda to see if they need any help there. Are you or any of your family injured?"

"Ah, just some bumps and scrapes," Korin replied. His voice shook a little, he sounded scared. "The lactils are out, though, they spooked and downed the fences. I will bring the wives and children up, as many others, but my brothers must catch the animals."

"Very well. We will remain here until you arrive." Qui-Gon closed the channel and put his comlink away where it belonged. He smiled faintly at Shassa and smoothed a hand over her furry head again. "It's all right, your family will come to take care of you. I will stay with you until they come."

"Yes, and you must go to Kalinda," the elderly Chadra-Fan agreed in a whisper. "They will need you. Haridi must have been packed, many could be hurt or dead. It was a very bad tremor."

I looked to Obi-Wan, and he seemed to share my sense of dread. "We'll do whatever we can to help," he promised. "This temple must be well stocked with medical supplies."

Qui-Gon looked over his shoulder at the two of us. "You should bring up some of those supplies and prepare to take them down to Kalinda. And have a look about, see how badly the temple is damaged."

"Yes, Master," the apprentice replied, and I nodded mutely.

The Jedi center was built strong and sturdy, and had withstood quakes before, so it was not much of a surprise to find that most of the damage was superficial. The structure itself was undamaged, though some of the transparisteel windowpanes were cracked and any made of real glass were shattered. Objects had fallen off shelves, pictures off walls, and furniture was either moved or toppled, but the clean-up would not take long inside. The most damage seemed to be the stones from the roof trim smashed all over the patio. I left Obi-Wan to do his own investigation and looked around our quarters, picking up a chair that had been knocked over and stepping carefully around shards of a broken vase. Loose objects were not in their right places, but other than that, it wasn't bad.

Stepping into my room, I found the large, heavy rod that bore the thick curtains over my windows lying across my bed, and I shuddered to think what would have happened had the quake hit at night while I was sleeping there. I glanced around, and to my dismay saw the cup which had sat atop my dresser, keeping the flowers Obi-Wan had given to me, was on its side on the floor. The water had already soaked into the thick floor rug, and the flowers lay helplessly beside the cup. I quickly picked up the cup and set it back in place, and smoothed the shaken petals of the star-flowers before gingerly resting the sprig back against the side of the cup. There was no time to get more water, though, more urgent things pressed my time. Just as I was satisfied that the flowers were not ruined, I turned to see Obi-Wan standing in the doorway. He had a peculiar expression on his face. "Is everything all right in here?"

"Pretty much," I replied. I noticed his eyes linger on the flowers. I pointed to the curtain rod. "We'll have to get that off before I try to go to bed tonight, though."

Obi-Wan looked at the heavy brass rod and immediately went to move it, easily lifting one end and sliding it onto the floor. "We'll put it back in place later. Come, I need your help. The medical supplies are below us, in storage, but the underground level has lost power. I need you to help me bring them up." I nodded and followed him out, ready to do anything he asked.

I was afraid we would take too long checking on the temple and bringing out supplies, but since we had to wait for Shassa's kin anyway, we wasted no time. Korin and a number of the clan arrived soon enough, and after Qui-Gon instructed some of the other females as to Shassa's condition and where things were in the temple which they might need, he had us all grab as much of the medical supplies as we could carry - not all of them by far, but at least a fair sample for now - and led a brisk march down the road to Kalinda. Something seemed eerie about the walk. Perhaps it was the lack of sound in the woodlands and fields along the road, the way all the birds and insects had fallen silent since the tremor. Or perhaps it merely stemmed from the apprehension I felt, dreading what we might find when we reached the town. But I kept my tension to myself and concentrated on following Qui-Gon.

The devastation in Kalinda appeared to grow worse as we approached the center of the sprawling city, where the swampy ground was much less stable and bigger buildings could be found. Most of the population had been concentrated in the central neighborhoods where the haridi was in full swing, where the effects of the quake were most severely felt. The small, simply-built huts of the Chadra-Fan had been reduced to piles of sticks, and tree limbs were down everywhere. The plank bridges and temporary balconies in the trees over the haridi did not survive the tremor, and Chadra-Fan who had been either on or under them at the moment of the quake fell victim to the damage. As we approached the center of Kalinda, the roar of thousands of voices reached us and made me clench my hands tighter on the boxes of medical supplies I carried. It wasn't the excited revel of the haridi, it was terror and great grief we could hear. "This is terrible," Obi-Wan murmured worriedly as we passed along roadways lined with fallen huts. "Their homes aren't built to withstand quakes, everything is demolished."

"Their homes are built so precisely because of quakes," Qui-Gon explained, though I could hear the quiet concern in his voice as well. "They are so common on Chad, the Chadra-Fan cannot afford to continually rebuild expensive structures. These flimsy huts are easily rebuilt, in no time, and the Chadra-Fan are wise enough not to be indoors when they feel the tremor begin." The cries of the wounded and frightened began to reach us, and the Jedi Master's face tensed with inward pain. He could feel their distress, and it hurt him to see these kindly creatures suffering. I could not feel them, but I could feel him and Obi-Wan, and their pain alone was hard to bear.

Furry forms ran past us, heading out of the central neighborhoods and toward their more distant homes, but occasionally one would stop and beg the Jedi to hurry to the center, to help some friend or relative or clan-mate of theirs who was injured. Qui-Gon stopped as often as he could, tended to whatever needs came to him, but rumor of the Jedi passed quickly through Kalinda and soon hordes of Chadra-Fan were eagerly seeking us out, begging for assistance and medical aid. The sheer numbers of them and their shrill, anxious voices overwhelmed me almost immediately, but my companions bore it better than I did. Still, after a time Qui-Gon raised his voice to the clamoring throngs. "Please, we cannot do more than one thing at a time!" he pleaded with them. "Let us get to the center of Kalinda, we can organize a relief effort better from there!"

It took more shouting and a bit of firmness, but at last the furry crowds parted and allowed the three of us passage through the busy streets to the big clearing at Kalinda's center where several nights earlier we had feasted and watched the skies. Now, the clearing had become a center-point in which the wounded and homeless congregated, racing around to find authorities or assistance from whoever would offer it. The problem was, each Chadra-Fan was just as helpless and hurt as the next, bewildered by the suddenness of the quake and the destruction of the haridi's happy atmosphere, so help was hard to find. Qui-Gon desperately asked around to find Kazik or any clan leader, but was forced to stop and give aid by clusters of Chadra-Fan who converged on the brown robes like moths to a lamp. The sunshine bright above us seemed a strange contrast to the utter chaos and devastation all around us. I found myself lost and confused, trying to understand the panicked chatter of the creatures who tugged at my trousers and demanded my help simply because I was taller and stranger than they. The medical supplies I carried were exhausted well before we even got to the center clearing, and my empty arms were little comfort to the Chadra-Fan who came to see if the humans would offer them help. In the end I had to hide behind Qui-Gon, unable to do a thing to help anyone and afraid that they would turn on me once they realized that.

Word was sent to Kazik, wherever he was, and he came to meet us as quickly as he could. The afternoon sun was beginning to sink toward the trees by the time he found us. "Jedi, oh Jedi, you came to help!" he realized, trembling from weariness as he clasped Qui-Gon's hands. "I thank you, I thank you so very much. You're not injured, are you? No, no, good. That is good. Thank you for coming to us. The damage is great, here. Many of my people have been killed." Tears shimmered in his black eyes, and moved me in sympathy, making my heart clench in my chest.

Qui-Gon lowered himself to his knees and continued to hold Kazik's paws firmly. "Everything we have, everything in my power to give you, is yours, Kazik," he said with deliberate calm. "The Jedi center is well-stocked with provisions and medical supplies, and all of it is yours. I will bring it to you box by box in my arms if I have to."

"Oh, no no no! Master Jinn, we have speeders," the chieftain assured, sobering himself quickly. "I will gather as many of my kin and friends as have speeders, and can pilot them, and we will go with you to bring the supplies. It is enough that you are here to help."

"Take my apprentice," Qui-Gon implored, rising and laying a hand on Obi-Wan's shoulder. The young man nodded sternly in acceptance. "He will help you load the supplies. Anyone seriously injured who can be moved is welcome in the Jedi temple, there is room and advanced medical equipment."

"Probably no more advanced than what we already have," Kazik protested, waving a paw. "Is good enough that you offer. I thank you. If some load can be taken off our hospitals, I will tell them they can send victims to your temple. Otherwise, it will be enough. Yes, I think it will be enough." He sighed heavily and looked around. "Organize. I must organize. Too much to do..."

"With your permission, I will see to it that relief is organized here, in the center," the Master offered. Kazik stared at him, impressed with his willingness and his respectful deference, and then nodded and started calling nearby police forces to him. I stood aside, huddled behind Obi-Wan, while Kazik and Qui-Gon arranged to have the able-bodied either sent home to get out of the way or organized to help dig the wounded out of the piles of wood and stone littering the city. There was so much to take care of - food, water, shelter, aid, and unfortunately, coroners' services. I didn't actually see any with my own eyes, but I knew from the information I heard passed on the streets and from the desperate wailing of broken-hearted creatures, the quake killed many of the unsuspecting Chadra-Fan. I cringed behind the Padawan with handfuls of his robe clutched in my hands as I realized the extent of the disaster.

Obi-Wan turned to me when he felt the tug of my fists on his robe. "What's wrong?" he wondered.

"I've never been around so much death and destruction before," I whispered to him, afraid of the furry throngs pressed on all sides of us. "I don't know what to do."

"Stay with Master Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan said gently, squeezing my shoulder. "He may need your help. Don't be afraid." He mustered a tiny smile, but at that moment Qui-Gon called to him to send him with the speeder drivers, so he said nothing more as he followed them away.

The Master saw me standing there and reached out a hand, drawing me closer to him. "It will be all right," he assured, leaning down to speak secretively in my ear. "Just stay close to me. They won't hurt you, they're frightened and confused. We need to make sure they don't make things worse in their panic."

"All right," I agreed, nodding bravely and swallowing my apprehension. He started off through the crowd, and I followed a step behind, watching while he directed foot traffic and called out orders to the hastily-organized volunteer rescue force. I noticed, then, that a badge Kazik usually wore on his coat was pinned to the edge of Qui-Gon's robe, in effect giving him the authority to act in the chieftain's place. It was a good thing, too, because without someone to speak up and take charge, the Chadra-Fan were running around in a panic, getting in the way of rescue teams trying to excavate the rubble of buildings and transport the wounded to the city's hospitals. I had not realized how proper and civilized Kalinda was, since the haridi turned the city into one giant street carnival, but saw now that there were speeder bikes whizzing everywhere, and larger landspeeders used for ambulances. The hospitals were not damaged too badly, but there were so many injured that the supplies from the Jedi center would be needed, and soon.

Directing the relief effort was not Qui-Gon's purpose for being in Kalinda. His hands were in the rubble alongside the paws of Chadra-Fan, and his strength was needed for lifting, carrying, and moving. Now and again he would calmly stand before an impossible task and lift a hand, and the Force would pry dangerous structures apart from the inside. The Chadra-Fan were glad to have him there, depending on his vision in the Force to probe beneath debris for buried bodies and precariously-stacked rubble that could injure unwary workers trying to clear it away. I listened to every order the Master gave and obeyed, throwing myself into any excavation work I could handle and hauling away the fallen timbers of houses and balconies. In no time I was dirty and sweaty, but I guess I never noticed until much later, until we had returned to the temple, because I only remember the blur of activity and the constant rise and fall of emotions, and the strain to my body. One moment we would be rejoicing at finding someone alive beneath the ruins of a tree-bridge, the next mourning our inability to get to a victim until it was too late. I wasn't strong like the Master, I couldn't lift walls or huge beams to get at the wounded, but I was available and healthy, and therefore they needed me. I worked in a haze for the rest of the afternoon, almost unaware when Obi-Wan returned from the center and came to assist his Master. He stepped alongside me and leaned his shoulder into the portion of a wall I was helping four Chadra-Fan raise, taking over for me. I stumbled and stared at him, realizing then that he had come and was there to give me a break, but I didn't actually step away until the wall had been removed and the area cleared for the medics to come in. Qui-Gon came to meet us, his robe gone and his long hair sticking to his face and neck with sweat. Without even saying a word, he draped an arm over my shoulders and led me away, leaving Obi-Wan to take my place on the rescue team. He got me to sit down somewhere and pressed a cup of water into my hand, and practically had to beg me to drink. "It's all right, you're doing well," he cajoled, smoothing a hand over my head while I sipped from the cup. My long hair was pulled back into a ponytail, but stray wisps had fallen out and teased my face, forcing me to constantly reach up with grimy hands to push them out of the way. Qui-Gon's gentle hands took care of those annoying wisps while I rested. "Thank you, Stacey."

"What for?" I mumbled, holding tight to the cup.

"For helping out. You stepped in almost without being asked, you've done the work of a Jedi today. I ask nothing of you, if you wish to continue to help, that is up to you. But..." I looked up at him as he paused. His face was grim. "Something like this can be overwhelming. If it gets to be too much, don't hesitate to step aside. There are enough hands around to do the work."

"Okay," I acknowledged, unsure what else to say or do. My head was already feeling what he meant by "overwhelming," but I refused to let it persuade me to give up just yet. The rest was nice, though, and I sat there sipping at the water while the bustle went on around us. Qui-Gon ran a hand over my hair one more time and got up, smiling down before moving away to resume his task. I looked around, feeling more alien and unwelcome than ever. Had I known what this day would bring, I would have undoubtedly told Master Qui-Gon to stuff it and stayed in bed that morning. And yet, I knew it was right to be where I was. Taking a deep breath, I finished off the water and rose to continue.

*****

By nightfall, Chad had returned to normal. Insects were singing in the brush again, and the moons glimmered peacefully down on the shadowed landscape. Very few Chadra-Fan had actually been brought to the center to recuperate, just a few of the less-seriously injured who could not find room in the packed hospitals of Kalinda. All of our unexpected guests were asleep before twilight, sequestered in second-floor rooms of the temple with curtains drawn and doors closed. The Jedi and I almost felt as alone as usual, no one bothered us or demanded our services as we ate a late, hurried meal and washed up after the long, hard day. I didn't feel much like eating, but a cold shower and change into clean clothes helped my otherwise sullen mood improve. I had seen more suffering in this one day than in twenty-four years on Earth, and just as Qui-Gon had said, it overwhelmed me. While he and Obi-Wan cleaned up from dinner, I wandered out onto the patio, but got no further than the doorway before I remembered that the stone deck was covered in rubble and our comfy chairs were broken. Instead of going outside, I sank down to a seat on the step that led down from the doorway and wrapped my arms around my knees, gazing distantly into the surrounding night. Before long I heard boots stepping lightly on the stone floor, and a Jedi lowered himself to a seat beside me. I glanced up at Qui-Gon as he held out a mug. "Here. I promised you warm spiced milk the other night, it seemed the right time for it."

"Thanks." I took the mug and cradled it in my hands, figuring it was too hot to drink from just yet. The heat chased away the chill of night, and I was already grateful for it, even though it stung the blisters on my raw palms as I held the cup. Obi-Wan appeared just as unexpectedly as his Master and crouched down on the step on my other side, smiling kindly. "You two came out to find me?" I asked.

"After what happened today, it's not good to be alone," Qui-Gon explained. As Obi-Wan settled down to a seat on my left, I noticed that both of them also carried steaming mugs of warm milk. The Master sipped lightly from his, his face solemn, remembering. "No matter how many years I spend as a Jedi, serving the worlds of the Republic, I never become accustomed to seeing such destruction and suffering. May I never," he added under his breath.

Obi-Wan glanced over at him. "Do you know how many were killed?" he asked cautiously.

Qui-Gon's face twitched briefly with discomfort. "I have heard too many conflicting reports to say for certain. Some are still unaccounted for. I would venture to guess that it is in the hundreds, though." I felt sick, hearing that. Qui-Gon shifted his gaze to me. "You've never seen this before."

"Not for real," I answered, unable to muster the strength to speak above a whisper. "I mean, we have quakes, and storms, and wars and stuff. But it's never happened to me, around me. I've only seen pictures on the news of places that I've never been to. It's never been real to me before." I finally took a sip of the warm milk and closed my eyes at the delicious sweetness trickling down my dry throat.

The Master's large hand came to rest on my back, encouraging me to relax, so I did, slumping against him and laying my head on his shoulder. "Your focus determines your reality," he said, then, and I smiled at the sound of such familiar words. "If you merely narrow your focus, seeing only that which is straight ahead of you, you would never know that there are people right beside you who may need you. I am proud of you. You allowed yourself not only to see the suffering all around you, but to move among it and try to stop it as best you could. It is all anyone could ask of you."

"I just did what was right," I said lamely, focusing on my cup and the steam rising from it in order to keep from remembering the horrors I had witnessed.

"You did well," Qui-Gon assured. "And now, you must put it out of your mind. Dwelling on it will not help you."

"Are we going back down there in the morning?"

"I don't think so," the Master replied with a glance across at Obi-Wan. I looked up and saw the solemnity in the Padawan's blue-green eyes. "I spoke with Kazik for a time this evening, and he said everything is coming under control. There is little more we can do except walk around, and right now it is best for everyone in Kalinda if we didn't get in their way. They seem to have a plan in place for quakes, to begin the process of rebuilding, so we would be more of a hindrance than a help at this point. But," he added with a sigh, "I will contact the Jedi Temple tomorrow, and inform them of this quake. A relief effort should be dispatched at once, with supplies and tools to get the Chadra-Fan back on their feet. And, you can be assured I will speak to the Council about this temple. It's not right that it should go to waste, and necessary supplies should pile up in storage when others need it."

"There isn't much in the way of supplies left, Master," Obi-Wan noted with a wry smile. "Nearly everything has been taken to Kalinda and given away. Barely enough is left here to last us a week."

"Good. We will be departing soon, I'm sure. It will be enough."

Exhausted and depressed, I continued to lean on Qui-Gon's shoulder, content to just sit there with his arm around me while the night deepened and the insects chirped around us. The three of us sat in the doorway in silence, drinking spiced milk and sinking into something resembling a meditative state as we stared across the patio at the moonlight playing on the rippled surface of the lake. I heard Obi-Wan sigh heavily, and felt like I had to say something. "You know," I began, looking first toward the apprentice and then up at Qui-Gon, "after a day like today, you start to realize what really matters in life. I feel so stupid about the things I've been worried about the last few days. In the grand scheme of things, they really don't matter."

"Like your feelings?" I heard a smile in Master Qui-Gon's voice but was afraid to look up and see it for myself. "Stacey, everything matters. Your life and the things you worry about are no more or less important than anything else. Because it doesn't involve anyone's immediate life or death does not mean it doesn't matter. But, if you are reconsidering your priorities..." His arm tightened in a quick embrace before withdrawing, and I finally looked up to face him, to take in his dreadfully honest face. He was serious again, his eyes dark pools of concern. "There was a moment today when I didn't know where you were, when I was afraid you might be hurt," he quietly murmured. "And I knew then that I cannot run from what's between us. You matter to me, in a way that goes beyond friendship."

He looked past me to Obi-Wan, then, and I turned my head to find out what his apprentice thought of this statement. Obi-Wan wore a faint smile, as if recalling something. "Obi-Wan?" I wondered. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, fine," the Padawan assured sweetly. "Master Qui-Gon and I had a good talk about this today. What lies between all three of us is not to be taken lightly."

"You have feelings for both of us," Qui-Gon said suddenly. I nodded, staring into my mug. His hand rested on my knee, giving it a friendly squeeze. "I admit I do not know what to do about this. I have never been placed in this situation before. I haven't handled it well up to this point, but I promise you a wiser course of action from now on. We will...take each day as it comes, I think. If we are patient, and press nothing, things will work themselves out in time."

"But...there's two of you. One of me," I pointed out. "What do I do?"

"Do what you think you should," Qui-Gon advised casually. "But if you want my honest opinion, I would say, don't press yourself to make any decisions yet. Everything is...uncertain in this moment. It would not be wise to act until a clearer path can be seen. Obi-Wan and I..." He looked over me to his apprentice again, and they shared a moment of unspoken agreement. Something had happened between them this afternoon, I could tell. "...well, there is no argument between us. We have agreed that we will not put passionate feelings above our bond as Master and Padawan, that is far more important than any transitory emotions."

"Whatever happens, we are both determined to accept it," Obi-Wan added. "There are many things that could happen. But no matter what, we cannot let it distract us from our duty as Jedi."

"That's very smart," I murmured, curling even further into a ball, clutching the mug more tightly to my chest. "I'm glad. The last thing I wanted was to cause conflict."

"There is no conflict. You can relax, and please - be yourself around us. Don't worry about what we will think." No sooner had Qui-Gon made this statement, and I felt both of them slip an arm around behind me, wrapping me in a Jedi sandwich. I started to chuckle under my breath, too weary to protest or think much of it beyond that. Master Qui-Gon took the empty mug from my hands and put it aside, and I laid my head on his shoulder again. He was my support, Obi-Wan was my comfort, and before long I found myself falling asleep between them.

On to part 17

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